A Renewed Love Affair

Just finished reading "The Godfather". It was an engaging and interesting book about the mafiaso in the United States. Somehow after hearing that one of my project group mate was reading "A Hundred Years of Solitude" -- Gabriel Garcia Marquez, I felt the need to read again. I think it's a somewhat competitive streak in me. The same one that struck me in kintergarden when I got third and was eyeing the gifts the top boy got at the award ceremony. Well, partly that, and partly because I missed the feeling of getting lost in a book. Of breaking off the reading feeling I've been thrown into another world. Cliche as it sounds, I have often been totally absorbed into the characters and environ of the book I read. So hopefully, this marks my renewed love affair with my "snobbish" (as opposed to thrashy) books.

But before I pick my next book at the library, I'm gonna watch the legendary Godfather series. Incidentally, the same groupmate has a copy of it on DVD. Now to get my grubby hands on it :P

A Charmingly Rustic Book

First week of school has been good. All my courses bar one are interesting. Some of them I'd even call fun. In fact, the supply chain class was so fun, I actually considered taking it just to learn and not for credit. As Prof Orman from the Johnson school would say " What? Students who don't want credit? Just want to learn?" That's pretty much the academic version of pigs can fly. All that aside, I'm happy that my last semester here will be exciting.

Today, for the first time, I actually saw the bookstacks in Uris Library. Uris is the building with the trademark clocktower of Cornell. It is also really ancient and archaic. It was a veritable labyrinth to the level 8 stacks where I was hoping to find "The Godfather". I climbed up two flight of dark stairs, enter a small dinghy door that said access to level 7 stacks, zigzagged through the student lounge and the Tower Cafe, finally gingerly walked through a door which looked more like the backroom or kitchen of the cafe than a way to access the precious manuscripts that the library houses. I did however find a copy of the book I wanted. I was initially aghast at its condition -- the fabric on the cover was ripped and threadbare; the words on the spine were so faint I nearly missed the book. I was pleasantly surprised, however, that I really liked the rustic feel of the book when I flipped though the book. Though it has obviously gone through hunderds of pairs of hands, the pages felt soft and inviting the touch. So here it is now sitting in my bag, happily waiting to fill the dreamy scene of a good book and hot chocolate in bed.

Now this is a big thing for me. I'm usually very very very and 5 more very pedantic when it comes to books. The cover has to be pristine. No page can be dogeared. Hands has to be washed so that the side of the book doesn't get grey with use. I handwrapped all my book in clear plastic with a patience that surprises even me. So I was really surprised when this rustic little book charmed me off my feet. And I was reminded of my dreams years ago of owning a quaint little bookshop (which will probably make losses since it really can't compete in terms of selection and price)

Greener Grass, Rounder Moon

It has been snowing furiously for the past 1 and 1/2 weeks. There had been no snow all through December and I was even commenting on how nice and mild the winter had been. Then suddenly, one week before school started, the capricious Ithaca weather struck again. The snowing hasn't let up at all and thick marshmallows of it has accumulated on the cars, lampposts and outdoor structures. In other parts of northeastern US, some people have reportedly been snowed in (My mum frantically gave me a call just a moment ago to check on me coz they saw some video on TV) So even though the temperatures went as low as -20c, it's not quite THAT bad.

As I was walking home, I was thinking that despite how much I hated the weather now, I'll probably miss it when I'm not here. Or rather especially since I am not here! As the saying goes, the grass is greener on the other side. So in my memories, there will be no slushy walks to school that makes my legs of my pants stiff with caked salt; I do not fall down on the sidewalk; my hands never felt frostbitten; my legs won't itch from the extreme dryness; my butt won't ache from walking in the snow day after day.

A Non-unique Me

I've been meaning to post something for a while but ended up doing other things instead. :
Phoenix Trip (Jan 12-Jan 13)
It's been a week since I went for my site visit in Phoenix. Most of the trip was spent at the airport and on the flight. Somehow, the low-fare, no-frill, no meals flights are kinda depressing especially when the flights are more than 3 hrs. It's somewhat sad that natioanl airlines in the US have become nothing more than glorified budget airlines.

Had to get up at 4am, had a 1 hr car ride to Syracuse, endure 7 hrs of the whole budget airline travelling experience, and then went straight to the workshop and finally got to the hotel at 4pm. Was pretty much pooped by then so didn't really get to explore the city of Phoenix. We had a nice dinner at Sam's, a Mexican restaurant that serves some really good salsa and tacos. The weather was also significantly better -- around 17c which is just like air-conditioning.

The worst part of the whole trip was probably the flight back when we were stuck at Atlanta for about 3 hours due to a heavy storm. The whole waiting was filled with a redolent mix of stale food, human sweat and jumpy eagerness to get on the next plane home. Despite their eagerness, I realized that people here actually wait for their rows to be called before entering the gate, quite unlike us Asians who have a tendency to cluster around the gate area, or even start a queue to enter the gate. On the other hand, American airlines also board from the front which is highly annoying since we have to wait for the inconsiderate slow pokes to put their luggage in the overhead.

Project (Jan 14 - the end of semester)
We've been working on our project dilligently. Things are going slow at the moment and for a while, I felt like we were in a slump. Today though, we are actually gonna start coding in Visual Basic for Applications (VBA). Well, by start coding, I mean two of the group of three (One of them would be yours truly) will try to learn to code in VBA while the last person will start coding.

The Remainder
I've never felt confident about coding in any form. It's not really that I can't do it but my brain keeps telling me that I can't do it. I think I have a horrible brain. It tells me about all the things I can't do instead of telling me what I can or should be able to. It has that irritating nay-sayer personality which makes me a little low in self-esteeem. These years have been spent battling that thing called my brain. I proved that I can indeed swim, ice-skate, write Standard Query Language (SQL) queries and cook more than one dish despite what the horrible pessimist in me has been saying.

Sometimes I wonder if other people feel the same way I do and fight the same battles. I would like to think that it is uniquely me, that I am special, valiant, a martyr and all that jazz. And I remember how upset I was in secondary school (high school) when I first realized that there are people who are similar to me. Well, I can only conjecture that they are the same, but somehow, I've lost the arrogance to think that what I feel and think is above what others might be able to feel.

A Kind Winter

It has been an uncharacteristically mild winter so far. The snow didn't really stay until about a week ago. The first year I was here was also a mild winter and it was all wintery white since mid-December. This winter is good for our car though. Having already paid $350 for maintenance work on the transmission, we were reluctant to face the hassle (and $$ pain) of getting snow tires.

Mom has been worried about us driving in winter but we don't plan to drive when it's snowing anyway. The experience one/two years ago was plenty freaky enough. It wasn't even like there was an accident but our car was trying to get into the parking lot near out house and it skidded so badly. The car slid into a pile of snow and we desperately tried to dig it out with our gloved hands. Really considered getting a shovel after that but we still don't own one as of now. In the end, a bunch of guys saw us and got out of their house and pushed the car out. Quite a memory it was.

The new parking spot we have now is a lot better than the one we had then. At least the driveway is moderately clean and the incline is not as steep so we don't usually have a hard time getting in. No more using the bike lock to smash the slippery ice along the driveway which made our tires spin wildly, trying to find something to bite into.

Anyway, I'll be going for a site visit on Wednesday. Won't be back till Thursday night. Yeah it's technically a business trip. Been starting on the project today. Will need to read more of those yucky scientific journals later.

Ticking Me Off

One of the things people can do to really tick me off is to first accuse me of something I didn't do and when they realize their mistake, contrive of some other way to make what I did seem wrong. A simple "I'm sorry. I made a mistake." would have earned you some respect.

Somehow, that is usually true of the figures of authority I've known -- not that I've known many. They assume that admitting to making a mistake is akin to admitting to a weakness. They are too self-centred to notice the damage they do when they knowingly gloss over their mistakes or worse still, try to exonerate themselves by placing the blame on an innocent party. Trying to make yourself look pristine and infallible does not get you anywhere when everyone knows that you are fallible and just as human as the next. I can't muster any shred of respect for a person who cares more about their face than about doing right, even if they are a genius at what they do.

A Sister in Law is me!

My sis is finally getting married. :) It's not that I've beening waiting to get rid of her, but she and William have been together long enough -- at least 6 years -- and she's definitely not getting any younger. Plus, I've always expected her to marry before I do.

The date of matrimony has been set to November 5th. I can imagine that she will soon have to get busy furnishing her new home and planning for the wedding. The first wedding in our house! It's definitely exciting.

Happy New Year everybody!
(heh heh bo liao post)

Truly too little too late? or just plain whining?

There's this guy who lives in Holland V with a blog which in general was an interesting read. I've also been reading another Singaporean father's blog as well. Recently, however, they've started on this tirade over how little how late the Singapore government and corporations are doing to help the victims of the tidal wave.

Firstly it was about the the Singapore Armed Forces medical team who is on standby to fly to Indonesia with relief supplies by Thursday to provide relief to earthquake and tidal wave victims. Here was what one of them said

Excerpt from Mr. Miyagi

Why so slow? Can't we fly our vaunted medical team there first, then help evaluate what needs to be done? Surely there'll be things to do as soon as you hit the ground, no? Maid agencies here can send sacked domestic helpers back to Indonesia faster than you can blink an eye, man! Not good enough, dudes!

I find it rather naive to think that foreign medical teams can just waltz into a country like Indonesia, start taking charge and "evaluate what needs to be done". While it takes only 2 hours to deploy the medical team to Indon, gathering neccesary supplies to help the injured takes time. Without sufficient supplies, elite medical teams are not going to be of much help. Given the general mayhem, Indonesia might not even have the resources to handle these foreigners and direct them where they are most needed any earlier than Thursday. However, I have to admit that the slowness might be a valid complaint. Afterall, if you think of it more simplistically, there are people who need help and we have people who can help, then there's no reason to delay giving the help right?

What really irked me was the complaint about local "(quasi-)corporations" not donating enough.

Another excerpt from Mr. Miyagi

Some corporations, really big ones, like Pfizer, Amazon.com, Citigroup, Cisco Systems, Bristol-Myers Squibb, have rallied in response to the tsunami disaster by donating generously.

Over here, our very own very big quasi-corporation, NTUC, 'expresses her deepest heartfelt condolences to the families of victims affected by last Sunday's tsunami that struck many parts of Asia, following the earthquake off the coast of Aceh, Sumatra.

Additionally, 5,000 food relief packages worth S$50,000 and weighing some 1.5-million tonnes have been sent to Colombo, Sri Lanka by NTUC Fairprice, which is working with Mercy Relief to raise up to S$100,000 for tsunami victims. [...]

As some Singaporeans are wont to say, very big corporations here must have very good reason for not being as generous as say, Abbott Laboratories. But you know what? Right now I just feel like telling some large local corporation they're a fcuking ntuc.

Errrm hello? the corporations he quoted as being generous make a hell of a lot more money than most of Singapore's "corporations". They are also more international. It's Pfizer (world's largest drug maker), Coca Cola, Pepsi, Cisco (!!!), etc. I don't think Singapore has a single company comparable to these giants.

Yet another excerpt:

There are a lot of people and corporations who have helped, or tried to help, even if they've been a complete moron and donated a pair of high heel shoes (I read this somewhere but I can't find the link). But [...] I am not about to pat these people on the back and say well-done, especially when they can do a whole lot more. What some of these giant local corporations (quasi-corporations included) are doing right now is akin to someone witnessing a person getting seriously hurt in a car accident and then merely leaving a packet of tissue paper for the victim.

Really? Who are you to say how much people should donate? If they don't want to or cannot afford to (which is realistic given that Singapore is still recovering from the economic downturn), these companies might need the money to grow and stay competitive. Who can really say how much another person can afford to donate and should donate? Instead of scrutinizing about whether other people are doing enough, why don't people just get out there and do something about it?

I'm personally so inundated with news of people dying that I believe I've become immuned to it all. Most people are only really concerned because the proximity to sudden death reminds them of their own mortality. A lot of the sympathy is really about "It could have been me". There's nothing really wrong with that. People are generally genuinely sympathetic but to an uninvolved person, this is yet another statistic. Another blip to the daily occurences. Life goes on.

During the Sept 11th incident, Americans got really worked up; Asians were mainly apathetic (So many people died, how sad. Next). Most people on this side of the globe who do not know anyone holidaying in the disaster struck areas are still worrying about their Christmas gift returns. This is the nature of humans. It is not that we are cold-hearted. We are all merely overloaded with information. It is not possible for a person to grieve over every single tragedy big and small. So we grieve only for the ones closest to home. Just like when we are bombarded with a multitude of sounds, our brain just shuts down and focus only on the most salient ones. This is the way humans are.

Article from Reuters

NY Times calls U.S. aid for tsunami "miserly"

NEW YORK, Dec 30 (Reuters) - The promised U.S. relief for South Asia's tsunami crisis is "miserly," and a U.N. official who criticized Western nations for not giving enough aid to the needy was "right on target," The New York Times said in an editorial on Thursday.

The senior U.N. relief official who chided wealthy Western nations for being "stingy" with their aid was not "misguided and ill informed," as President George W. Bush said on Wednesday, the newspaper wrote.

U.N. emergency relief coordinator Jan Egeland made the statement in reference to general aid supplied by the wealthy countries, but later praised the rapid international response to the tsunami that hit 12 countries on Sunday.

The Times said: "We beg to differ (with Bush). Mr. Egeland was right on target."

"But the $35 million remains a miserly drop in the bucket, and is in keeping with the pitiful amount of the United States budget that we allocate for nonmilitary foreign aid.

The Times chided Bush for waiting until Wednesday to express his sympathy to leaders of India, Sri Lanka, Thailand and Indonesia for Sunday's disaster that has left an estimated 120,000 people dead and millions homeless. The president announced the increase in U.S. aid to $35 million on Wednesday, saying it was "only the beginning."

The Times added that it hoped Secretary of State Colin Powell was embarrassed to announce "the initial measly aid offer" of $15 million. "That's less than half of what Republicans plan to spend on the Bush inaugural festivities," in January.

Although many Americans believe the United States spends a great deal on foreign aid, the amount is less than one quarter of 1 percent of its budget, the newspaper noted. U.S. spending on development aid in 2003 was $16.2 billion, less than the $37.1 billion from the European Union.

The newspaper also urged Bush to make good on U.S. relief pledges and noted that U.S. relief for the Bam, Iran earthquake a year ago still has not been delivered.

Disaster Strikes at the Most Inopportuned Time

I've counted my lucky stars numerous times that Malaysia and Singapore were not close to any fault lines -- no volacones, no earthquakes, no hurricanes behind your backyard -- and are thus not subject to the whims of mother nature. I guess I was wrong. A 9.0 earthquake in the ocean sent tidal waves strong enough to kill tens of thousands, reaching even Penang and Langkawi which I had thought were safe havens from nature's wrath.

Excerpts from BBC Online

Disaster Toll
Sri Lanka: 13,000 dead
Indonesia: 4,500 dead
India: 3,500 dead
Thailand: 839 dead
Malaysia: 44 dead
Maldives: 32 dead
Burma: 30 dead
Bangladesh: 2 dead

Asia battles earthquake aftermath
Survivors and rescuers are battling the devastation left by sea surges that wiped out entire communities, killing about 23,000 people.

The death toll is still spiralling upwards and mass graves are being dug even as people hunt for the missing.

The extent of the damage is still not known in areas worst hit, including Sri Lanka, Indonesia, India and Thailand.

International aid efforts have begun amid fears that disease could spread through the disaster zone.

Survivors may have little clean water or sanitation as they try to build shelters and bury the dead after Sunday's 9.0 magnitude earthquake sent huge waves from Malaysia to Africa.

"This may be the worst natural disaster in recent history because it is affecting so many heavily populated coastal areas... so many vulnerable communities," UN emergency relief co-ordinator Jan Egeland told CNN.

In northern Indonesia, nearest to the epicentre of the undersea quake, the vice-president said he feared fatalities in the worst-hit province of Aceh could rise as high as 20,000. [...]

Aftershocks

The number of dead has also soared well into the thousands in Sri Lanka and India, and thousands more may have been killed on the Andaman and Nicobar islands where reports say entire communities were swept into the sea.

Packed holiday resorts in Thailand were also badly hit, and the waves killed people in Malaysia, the Maldives, Burma and Bangladesh.

Thousands are missing and many more thousands forced from their homes by the worst earthquake in 40 years that generated a wall of water speeding across the oceans.

Hundreds of fishermen are feared drowned off the coast of Somalia, officials said.

Aftershocks have also been detected, sparking warnings from Indian and Sri Lankan weather officials of further, smaller surges, also known as tsunamis.

Sri Lankan rescue workers have been combing the coastline by ship, plane and helicopter, searching for survivors and pulling the dead from the water.

About a million are now homeless. [...]

In Thailand, bodies were still being taken to makeshift morgues in the resort of Phuket.

Many are said to be clad in swimsuits, with people dragged to their deaths as the tsunami smashed into beaches without warning. [...]

Sunday's tremor - the fifth strongest since 1900 - had a particularly widespread effect because it seems to have taken place just below the surface of the ocean, analysts say.

Experts say tsunamis generated by earthquakes can travel at up to 500km/h.

No more Toys "R" Us

I don't wanna grow up
I'm a Toys R Us kid
They've got a million toys at Toys R Us
That I can play with
From bikes to trains to video games
It's the biggest toy store there is
I don't wanna grow up, because if I did
I wouldn't be a Toys R Us kid.
More games, more toys. (Oh boy!)
I wanna be a Toys R Us Kid

When I was a wee kid of 12, going to Toys "R" Us was one of my biggest dreams. Being able to run amok along the aisles and aisles of toys and pick anything I want was probably my deathbed wish at that time. The Toys "R" Us store was in Subang and since we lived a good 45 minutes to an hour away, I never got to prowl those fantasy aisles. The first Toys "R" Us I ever visited was in Singapore. e* wanted to go buy a toy for her JC classmate so we visited this dinghy one that was located along Orchard Road. The ceilings were grey from age and the once pristine tiles worn from the years of ponding feet. Still, Toys "R" Us remained to me what a child's paradise should be.

Recently however, there has been news that Toys "R" Us has fallen from grace. Once the biggest toy store with a leading market share of 20%, it is now lagging behind mass retailers like Walmart and Target. It has supposedly indicated in August that it may sell its toy division in favor of concentrating on it faster growing baby supplies division, Babies "R" Us. What? How could Toys "R" Us no longer sell toys? This is outrageous. It's like Coca Cola selling their soft drinks division and concentrate on selling napkins instead.

Recently, I've been walking the Target toy sections but can't really seem to relive the joy and excitement of browsing toys anymore. It could be the trend where most toys are based off some movie like Lord of the Rings is putting me off. The Bratz dolls and alien-teletubby look-alike toys aren't making it more appealing either. Or as I've said before, it could be that I've grown old. No more Toys "R" Us kid for me. :(

Merry Christmas

Merry Christmas everybody. Haven't been feeling motivated to blog recently. Life is enjoyable but nothing really out of the ordinary is happenning. Most of the time, darling and I are playing on the MUD. I figured nobody is really is interest in my game achievements.

Anyhow, have a happy Christmas everyone. Enjoy the well earned holiday!

Beamers

I can be so silly sometimes. As I've mentioned before, I play this MUD. And now I'm beaming so happily that my cheeks are aching just because I did this special quest and got an item nobody has. I think it's really the collector in me: instead of stickers, erasers and stamps, I now collect virtual equipment.

When I'm happy like that, I beam like a silly cow.

Darling is off grading some finals. He had to choose to grade the hardest question of them all. So I can't share the beamer-worthy news. *beams happily*

Wheee it's over!

Haha my finals lasted all of 20 minutes. For an exam scheduled for 2 and 1/2 hours (standard exam slot), it had 10~15 MCQs (MCQs!!! Haven't seen them for a while) and three short questions. Yups only three of those and they were really short too.

Heh heh shouldn't have bothered reading all those notes.

The horrors of bad english

Talking about the things that girls do to their hair --> "blowjobs on wet/dry hair and styling"

Horrible images swim in my head.
My cheeks are aching from laughing too much.

White Christmas

This winter turned out to be really warm. So far, it has snowed about three times and everytime, the snow melted within a day. No snow storm overnight like last year (and no power outtages as well). No calf height snow to trudge through. For once, Christmas here might not be very white.

Had to send the car for some transmissions related repairs. That was a pretty ouchful US$320 but at least the little baby is okay. Pretty reluctant to shell out another $300~$400 for snow tires though so we'd probably not be going out much over winter. Which means I'll be stocking up on food soon and start the hibernation!!

Heh heh darling keeps asking me what I'd like for Christmas but I honestly can't think of anything I really care about. A quiet dinner at home sounds like a pretty good plan.

It's funny thinking about how I've changed. When I was younger, I've always wistfully think about celebrating Christmas -- throwing parties, decorating the Christmas tree, exchanging beautifully wrapped presents... A lot of things I've wanted to do has melded into the shadows, no longer consequential. If I had known, I'd become a docile little housekeeper 6/7 years back, I'd be astounded. But back then, I also didn't know the blissfulness nor contentment I know now.

Somehow I feel more certain about my future. Not so much about what I'd do but just confident that the future will be good and full of joy regardless of whatever I chose to do. I feel that I can trust myself to overcome whatever obstacles that fly by my way, to make the right decisions when the need arises. It's a good feeling to have. :)

Unlucky Feet

I've been really feet unlucky of late. First I stubbed my big toe and broke a big chunk of the nail. Then I kicked some rock as I was walking. There was bleeding under the nail and now I have an ugly patch of blood clot on that toe. Hmmm it might just be the same toe too! And then a couple of days ago, I was running to the bathroom and kicked my little toe. The skin right below the toe split and I now have a plaster over it. Bah me and my horrible feet luck. I have a lucky halflings foot! Or rabbit foot. Or whatever.

Laptops a Hot Fertility Issue

Interesting story about laptops and fertility.

Men who regularly balance their laptop computers on their laps when working may be jeopardizing their ability to have children, according to a new study from fertility researchers at the State University of New York at Stony Brook.

The potential risk comes from the heat generated by the laptop computer and the close position of one's thighs when balancing the computer on one's lap, the researchers found. This heat is transferred to the scrotum, where the temperature can rise several degrees, putting users within the danger zone for testicular dysfunction. [...]

Scientists have known for years that an increase of even 1 degree Celsius in testicular or scrotal temperature can decrease the production of healthy sperm by as much as 40 percent. In the Stony
Brook study, researchers found that test subjects who sat for an hour with running laptops on their laps had a median increase in scrotal temperature of 2.6 to 2.8 degrees Celsius.

The 29 volunteers, aged 21 to 35, were also asked to sit with their thighs together for an hour without a laptop. This resulted in a median increase in scrotal temperature of 2.1 degrees, suggesting that the act of balancing a laptop computer is just as much to blame as the
heat generated by it.

The most hilarious line in the whole article though, has to be this:

The tests did not measure the volunteers' actual sperm production.

First it was handphones in the pocket, now it's laptops. Heh heh Singapore might need to ban both to give the population a hand in acheiving their baby targets :P

Smoker's are dumb!

I've always thought that smokers are dumb. Apparently, now it's official. Or at least according to this study.

Excerpt:

Researchers from the Universities of Aberdeen and Edinburgh looked at how the cognitive abilities of smokers and non-smokers changed over time.

They found smokers performed significantly worse in five separate tests. [...]

It would appear that the well-worn cliché that 'smoking stunts your growth' may be true when it comes to intellectual development Amanda Sandford, Action on Smoking and Health. [...]

Current or former smokers were found to perform less well in the tests even after factors such as childhood IQ, education, occupation and alcohol consumption were taken into account.

The effect appeared to be stronger in current smokers according to the study, which was also published in the journal Addictive Behaviors. The researchers suggest a "small but significant" negative effect of 4% linked to the combined effects of smoking and impaired lung function - itself linked to smoking.

It has been suggested in previous studies that there could be a link between impaired lung function and a negative effect on the thinking processes, but it is not clear what the mechanism for that might be.

Dr Lawrence Whalley of the University of Aberdeen, who led the research, said the explanation could be that smoking causes oxidative stress - cumulative damage caused by molecules called "free radicals" - to organs including the brain.

"Ageing neurons are very sensitive to oxidative damage."

The Nerd Theory

I've always thought of the whole idea of popularity was something not so smart people come up with the differentiate themselves. If you know you can't be the best at studying, why not invent some concept that you can be good at? This guy's theory presented an interesting alternative: nerds are unpopular because they don't care about being popular. Being of the nerd school, I'd say it's pretty interesting.

Excerpt:

I know a lot of people who were nerds in school, and they all tell the same story: there is a strong correlation between being smart and being a nerd, and an even stronger inverse correlation between being a nerd and being popular. Being smart seems to make you unpopular.

Why? [...] Being smart doesn't make you an outcast in elementary school. Nor does it harm you in the real world. Nor, as far as I can tell, is the problem so bad in most other countries. But in a typical American secondary school, being smart is likely to make your life difficult. Why?

The key to this mystery is to rephrase the question slightly. Why don't smart kids make themselves popular? If they're so smart, why don't they figure out how popularity works and beat the system, just as they do for standardized tests?

The answer, I think, is that they don't really want to be popular.

If someone had told me that at the time, I would have laughed at him. Being unpopular in school makes kids miserable, some of them so miserable that they commit suicide. Telling me that I didn't want to be popular would have seemed like telling someone dying of thirst in a desert that he didn't want a glass of water. Of course I wanted to be popular.

But in fact I didn't, not enough. There was something else I wanted more: to be smart. Not simply to do well in school, though that counted for something, but to design beautiful rockets, or to write well, or to understand how to program computers. In general, to make great things.

At the time I never tried to separate my wants and weigh them against one another. If I had, I would have seen that being smart was more important. If someone had offered me the chance to be the most popular kid in school, but only at the price of being of average intelligence (humor me here), I wouldn't have taken it. [...]

And that, I think, is the root of the problem. Nerds serve two masters. They want to be popular, certainly, but they want even more to be smart. And popularity is not something you can do in your spare time, not in the fiercely competitive environment of an American secondary school.

Alberti, arguably the archetype of the Renaissance Man, writes that "no art, however minor, demands less than total dedication if you want to excel in it." I wonder if anyone in the world works harder at anything than American school kids work at popularity. Navy SEALs and neurosurgery residents seem slackers by comparison. They occasionally take vacations; some even have hobbies. An American teenager may work at being popular every waking hour, 365 days a year.