Yay, I actually managed to finish the SQL (Standard Query Language) problem in my problem set due today. ALL BY MYSELF!!!
(*singing/mangling*
All by myself
Don't wanna be
All by myself
Anymoreeeeeeeee
*end horrible singing*)
I have a low self-esteem. (well, admitting it is probably a good start) Unless I know a subject in great detail, I have a tendency to defer to others who are in actuality probably knows about as much as I do. I wonder how many times my self-esteem (note: lack of) has contributed to my failure to perform that task.
Somehow, when it comes to programming, I'm feel even more vulnerable and clueless than usual. *Somehow* I also persist in taking courses that require me to learn it. Like this IT course. I've always felt the need to conquer my worst field. Call it a sadistic streak. There's a great sense of satisfaction derived from overcoming the worst intellectual hurdle you can find. It makes me feel like I can overcome anything.
Haha, to think of it, maybe my determination to work on something I'm not good at doesn't do my esteem any good since I'm more likely to fail in the endeavor. In lab this Wednesday, we were supposed to write some html, javascrip and asp code. One of the questions required us to mix javascript and asp. Lectures so far have only covered very basic code structure and standard tags, so we were pretty much stumped. The code refused to compile. Online help was limited. The TA was busy teaching the other kids. We just fumbled with the same lines of code that just refused to even compile. My head was getting light. Voices started to grate in my ears. The tag on my shirt was chaffing me in every way possible. I felt the urge to kick something (I kinda kick the CPU *guilty look*) My mind was blanking out.
The sense of frustration was getting waaaay way to familiar. Kinda like the first time I learnt Java. Same feeling of helplessness. Like being trapped in a spherical room with no door.
Songs that I just remembered I enjoyed:
Born Slippy by Underworld
Block Rockin' Beats by Chemical Brothers
New Favorite Dance Artists: BT and DJ Tiesto
"New" celebrity fact: Savage Garden split and Darren Hayes is doing solos.
Thursday, September 30, 2004
Paul Frank vs Psycho Chihuahua!!! (Chihuahua wins!)
I don't get it. What's so nice about a big-mouthed, lipsticked monkey? I see lots of these Paul Frank merchandise, heard people gush about them and I'm like W-T-F!!! That monkey face kinda makes me want to punch someone. My psycho chihuahua is so much cuter. Gimme the psycho!!!
Paul Frank vs
Psycho Chihuahua
Paul Frank vs
Psycho Chihuahua
Wednesday, September 29, 2004
Granola People!!!!
Phrase of the day, courtesy of my prof -- "the granola people"
As opposed to "red-meat loving family". Remember me mentioning that my area is inhabited by hippies? The word granola has never looked more lovely. Disclaimer: Any insults to the granolas are not intended. Gran bars are actually pretty nice.
As opposed to "red-meat loving family". Remember me mentioning that my area is inhabited by hippies? The word granola has never looked more lovely. Disclaimer: Any insults to the granolas are not intended. Gran bars are actually pretty nice.
Tuesday, September 28, 2004
Sticky doors and I
Trying to finish off my TWO problem sets that are due tomorrow. One of the questions for my entrepreneurship class left me totally clueless. So I asked a guy who was in the same class. Except as shown below.
me: for qn 4 of the hw right, what are the risks for the model ah?
me: i can't think of a single one leh
me: in the end i cooked up some story about how they are very specialized but then that's still only one. any ideas?
him: i looked up "the succesful business plan" p126-7
him: in the end, i had competitive, technology and capitalization risks
me: oooh good idea. i'll go look at it.
him: 3 boooring reasons
me: heh heh boring better than no answer :P
me: i cannot find the successful business plan thing leh...it's in the allen book right?
him: that's the title of the book! the successful business plan
me: oops.......
me: hrrm hrrm did i not bother to buy the book? okay book-hunting time
me: can i go to your place and borrow your book? *sheepish grin*
So darling drove me over to his place. I was gonna walk since it was just a couple of minutes away.
me: So you want to go with me?
darling: Yeah. (with the duh! flex to his tone) Otherwise how are you going to get to his place?
me: Err okay.
.... Minutes later....
me: Eh, I think that's his house.
(zooms past)
darling: I didn't know it was so close.
me: I thought you saw the map when i mapquested it.
darling: Guess we'll have to turn around then.
... minutes later...
darling: hmmm how to get in.
(The house faces one of the main roads and has no obvious parking space in sight)
darling: You want to get off and then walk back yourself?
me: okay.
Bah, should have just walked out by myself in the first place. Can save up on fuel. Esp in view of the fact that oil prices have crossed the sacred $50 per barrel mark. (darling is looking at me type this with distressed look.... *stopping for a moochie break* *mushiness advisory: May be nauseating to most*... ... ... ... ... ... okay back)
So yeah, I walked up to his house. The front door was not locked so I went in. I *think* it's apartment #4. Bingo, found his name on the mail box. So I walked to the *second* front door (these are popular in America coz it insulates the house by trapping a layer of air between the house proper and the wintry air outside.) The doorknob was pretty much useless. It just turns round and round like a headless fly. I tried pushing the wooden door but it didn't really budge. I saw the lock above the knob. Maybe they have to use a key to enter.
Then I saw these 5 buttons to the right of the door. 4 regular black ones and one bigger white one. One for each apartment? But they weren't labelled. I'm guessing apartment 4 should be the bottom right one among the black ones. I pressed it twice. Imaginary doorbells are ringing in my head. *pause* did they hear me? *press press* *pause* Still no response. Maybe I'm getting the wrong apartment. I went through the whole series of buttons. I even pressed the last one which I thought either meant it was for apartment 5, or they had 5 people in the apartment, or it was the main bell for the whole house. *press big white button* Still no response. Great! I glared back at the washer and dryers that were outside, watching my antics. (queer place to have them really. Are they so useless that no one would steal them?)
Getting frustrated, I pushed the door harder. It swung open. Stupid sticky wooden doors.
P.S: I should have known. My own apartment door is sticky too. Do these Americans build their own freaking homes?!? Somebody needs to learn some precision engineering...
me: for qn 4 of the hw right, what are the risks for the model ah?
me: i can't think of a single one leh
me: in the end i cooked up some story about how they are very specialized but then that's still only one. any ideas?
him: i looked up "the succesful business plan" p126-7
him: in the end, i had competitive, technology and capitalization risks
me: oooh good idea. i'll go look at it.
him: 3 boooring reasons
me: heh heh boring better than no answer :P
me: i cannot find the successful business plan thing leh...it's in the allen book right?
him: that's the title of the book! the successful business plan
me: oops.......
me: hrrm hrrm did i not bother to buy the book? okay book-hunting time
me: can i go to your place and borrow your book? *sheepish grin*
So darling drove me over to his place. I was gonna walk since it was just a couple of minutes away.
me: So you want to go with me?
darling: Yeah. (with the duh! flex to his tone) Otherwise how are you going to get to his place?
me: Err okay.
.... Minutes later....
me: Eh, I think that's his house.
(zooms past)
darling: I didn't know it was so close.
me: I thought you saw the map when i mapquested it.
darling: Guess we'll have to turn around then.
... minutes later...
darling: hmmm how to get in.
(The house faces one of the main roads and has no obvious parking space in sight)
darling: You want to get off and then walk back yourself?
me: okay.
Bah, should have just walked out by myself in the first place. Can save up on fuel. Esp in view of the fact that oil prices have crossed the sacred $50 per barrel mark. (darling is looking at me type this with distressed look.... *stopping for a moochie break* *mushiness advisory: May be nauseating to most*... ... ... ... ... ... okay back)
So yeah, I walked up to his house. The front door was not locked so I went in. I *think* it's apartment #4. Bingo, found his name on the mail box. So I walked to the *second* front door (these are popular in America coz it insulates the house by trapping a layer of air between the house proper and the wintry air outside.) The doorknob was pretty much useless. It just turns round and round like a headless fly. I tried pushing the wooden door but it didn't really budge. I saw the lock above the knob. Maybe they have to use a key to enter.
Then I saw these 5 buttons to the right of the door. 4 regular black ones and one bigger white one. One for each apartment? But they weren't labelled. I'm guessing apartment 4 should be the bottom right one among the black ones. I pressed it twice. Imaginary doorbells are ringing in my head. *pause* did they hear me? *press press* *pause* Still no response. Maybe I'm getting the wrong apartment. I went through the whole series of buttons. I even pressed the last one which I thought either meant it was for apartment 5, or they had 5 people in the apartment, or it was the main bell for the whole house. *press big white button* Still no response. Great! I glared back at the washer and dryers that were outside, watching my antics. (queer place to have them really. Are they so useless that no one would steal them?)
Getting frustrated, I pushed the door harder. It swung open. Stupid sticky wooden doors.
P.S: I should have known. My own apartment door is sticky too. Do these Americans build their own freaking homes?!? Somebody needs to learn some precision engineering...
Monday, September 27, 2004
Censorship?!? Nevah!
If there was no one else who reads this blog, would I have written any differently? I guess. There's this sense of selective communication here that is similar to the way we (fine, I) interact with other people. Did I delete those posts I typed about my obsessive miserly behavior and the other one where I was bitching about some Best Singaporean blog thing because I felt they were pretty inane, or did I want to hide the darker fringes of myself?
I would love for this blog to be a pure undulated representation of myself but that would probably resulted in information overload for my dear friends. I'm sure nobody really wants to know when I go to class, when I come home, whether I took a nap...the likes. I would probably bore myself to death first. Imagine, that was the grocery list style that I had when I first started a diary at 13. So yeah, I already have a whole book full of what I ate for breakfast and who wore what color that day. Don't need another one thank you.
Censorship is definitely an issue in many blogs. How much are you willing to tell? How can you restrict access to different levels of intimate material to different people? Often, a blog is like a free peep-show into another's life. Between friends, it's a channel to keep in touch (remember when emails used to be the thing for doing that) A blog is so personal yet so public. Sometimes, I wonder about the random people who hops pass my blog. It's a funny feeling when someone you don't know about reads about you and whatever snippets of your life you're willing to share. How much of you do they actually know? While they know not about the length of your hair or your features, they know a lot more than most passing acquaintances. Somehow, there's something intimate, yet distant.
To so many bloggers, blogs offer them their 5 minutes of fame, sans the embarrassment of failure, a la William Hung. It's a springboard for budding writers where they can start building up a loyal base of readership. What is it really to me?
When I was in my teens (god, I can actually say that now. Not that I want to, I think. I still can't decide if I really actually want to grow up. Granted that it really doesn't matter what I think. Time has a will of its own) I contemplated being a writer. But at that time, it was for all the wrong reasons, I had something to prove. Whatever it is, I can't remember. I do remember however, the symphony of the soul as words are conjured from the tips of my fingers (namely the index and middle fingers since I type with only a pair of each) They come in torrents, sometimes trickles, but regardless, it is a lovely feeling.
I am not artistically endowed. Whatever talents I had at art was crushed when my sister grouchily supervised my nascent attempts at painting. She was ferocious. Partly because she would rather spend her time doing something else. I remember holding a slender paintbrush, a dilemma in my hands. To paint or not paint? As the brush was pressed on the thin drawing pad, it was always wrong; when it lingered, a sharp voice would berate me for its tardiness. Either way, I was on the losing end. As a coddled child, I was practically banned from doing any serious with needles or saucepans. Sometimes I wish I could sew my own dresses or cook up a storm. Just like the times when I wish pigs could fly.
Saturday, September 25, 2004
"She has a fat ass"
That was what I heard the little boy say. The one who I'm convinced was peering into my room through the blinds. Grrr, how dare he peek into my room and insult me while he's at it!!! He should thank his lucky stars that he scurried away fast enough. *indignant grunt* Darling is convinced that it's just my bad hearing acting up again, which made me pfft at him. Bad hearing indeed!!! Most of the time when I can't hear him well, I'm either a) doing the dishes with the tap running and he is in another room b) I'm in the toilet (and he's not) and our bathroom has this background ventilation fan sound when the lights are turned on (and he's prob like 3 rooms away) c) I could swear he was mumbling.
Speaking of fat somethings, there is this girl in my class. I don't know if she only has too tight spagetti tanks in her wardrobe but I saw her in a similar top on Wednesday and here it was again on Friday, the exact same top in cruel fuschia. She sat down, her back slightly hunched (as in the curse of our generation who sit eternally in front of a pc), her tummy fats scrunched up in a tight grimace. Two sets of angry fuschia boobs glared back at me, one atop another like a family of tare pandas. I just stared back in horrified fascination.
Tare panda family ---------->
Currently playing: S Club 7 -- Reach
P.S: Any suggestions on songs to listen to? I have a subscription to Napster but I haven't been listening to tunes for a while.
Speaking of fat somethings, there is this girl in my class. I don't know if she only has too tight spagetti tanks in her wardrobe but I saw her in a similar top on Wednesday and here it was again on Friday, the exact same top in cruel fuschia. She sat down, her back slightly hunched (as in the curse of our generation who sit eternally in front of a pc), her tummy fats scrunched up in a tight grimace. Two sets of angry fuschia boobs glared back at me, one atop another like a family of tare pandas. I just stared back in horrified fascination.
Tare panda family ---------->
Currently playing: S Club 7 -- Reach
P.S: Any suggestions on songs to listen to? I have a subscription to Napster but I haven't been listening to tunes for a while.
Friday, September 24, 2004
Obsessed with all things girlish
I'm imbibing as much knowledge of cosmetics and clothing as I can before I actually start work. Except for the occasional lipstick/lipgloss (which actually only started at the beginning of this year), I usually go nude faced. I've never actually touched a mascara before. Have no idea how to style eyebrows. Infernally afraid of eyeliners. The last time I actually had foundation on was for a college performance when I was caked with the most horrifying amounts of blusher, foundation, ...everything. Under the harsh stage lights, I looked like the foxy mistress I was supposed to be. In reality, I looked a freak show on the loose. So yeah, that really didn't count as much of a make-up experience. It's proven that going without make-up makes you look young -- in a I'm-still-in-college-way. Actually the girls in college actually put on make-up 24/7, even when they are working out. Seeing a girl with her lashes laden with viscous mascara, while sweating (*aristocratic fake french accent* excusez moi, perspiring *end aristorcatic fake french accent* ) casually, is pretty odd. Kinda like my elephant in heels comparison. Or as the chinese proverb goes "sa ji yan yong niu dao" (read: you don't need a knife to kill a bull to slaughter a chicken)
*are cosmetics generally water-proof? Coz women generally do not carry bags which look like they can carry an umbrella. So women just stand and wait till the rain stops? But what if you have some place you really need to go to? Call your 7489875 boyfriends like a damsel in distress? Well, I guess alternatively, you could call for a cab
But anyway, the thing is I already look damn freaking young. I'm not particularly tall, I have a baby face and people say I'm cute. CUTE!!!!! Arrrrrrgh!!!! So yeah, I need clothes and make-up to proclaim that I'm like 23! That might help in reducing the number of times I get carded at bars or R(A) movies. Still remember that time at Zouk with e* where I was actually the eldest of the group of girls but ended up being the only one carded. Gah!
Well, as I do my "market" research, expect more posts about silly things like bags, shoes, clothes and make-up. Ha, tips would be welcomed too :P
*are cosmetics generally water-proof? Coz women generally do not carry bags which look like they can carry an umbrella. So women just stand and wait till the rain stops? But what if you have some place you really need to go to? Call your 7489875 boyfriends like a damsel in distress? Well, I guess alternatively, you could call for a cab
But anyway, the thing is I already look damn freaking young. I'm not particularly tall, I have a baby face and people say I'm cute. CUTE!!!!! Arrrrrrgh!!!! So yeah, I need clothes and make-up to proclaim that I'm like 23! That might help in reducing the number of times I get carded at bars or R(A) movies. Still remember that time at Zouk with e* where I was actually the eldest of the group of girls but ended up being the only one carded. Gah!
Well, as I do my "market" research, expect more posts about silly things like bags, shoes, clothes and make-up. Ha, tips would be welcomed too :P
Thursday, September 23, 2004
The Price of (perceived) Beauty
Three girls walked in front of me and Johnny as we walked home from the engineering colloquium. The one on the far right was wearing a chripy blue, off-shoulder top and jeans. Except her off-shoulder was more off-everything. I could see her black bra with ruffled trimmings. If she leave her arms straight by her side, the whole top would probably fall off. I don't think the "I just got up and can't be bothered" profile fits her since she was obviously well caked with make-up. "It's comfortable" doesn't seem to really describe her ensemble as well since she literally has to walk around with her arms in a chicken dance position. So the next possible explanation that comes to mind is that she wants attention or that she thinks it's sexy/ nice/ creative (we have so many hippies in this area. think: goth make-up and pretty much goth everything, lots of vegans, enrivonmentalist types, etc...)
I've always thought it funny that women take so much effort to keep their undergarments from view (t-shirt bras with "invisible" lines, g-strings with no pantylines, the outrage at being panty/bra-peeked... etc) but somehow wearing a bikini at a beach (or anywhere else) is considered okay. Well, the issue about bra imprints and panty-lines may be more aesthetic than modesty but this girl with her black girlie bra just looked kinda skanky. Kinda reminds me of the "How much does it cost to look so cheap" article in Cosmo which showed some celebs in some cheap-looking outfit (think: bustier, mini shorts and fur coat combination, designer guni sack -- the kind of sack you use to pack 50kg of rice) which cost a bomb. Too bad I've recycled that issue. It's actually quite keep-worthy.
P.S: Hey hey, yufen, I got your lanterns today!!! I really like the big blue one leh. Hee hee I thought you were joking when you said you will send me lanterns!! Thank you!!!! Errr so does anyone know when zhong chiu (mid-autumn festival) is? I'm all ready to light my Jill-o-lantern's!
I've always thought it funny that women take so much effort to keep their undergarments from view (t-shirt bras with "invisible" lines, g-strings with no pantylines, the outrage at being panty/bra-peeked... etc) but somehow wearing a bikini at a beach (or anywhere else) is considered okay. Well, the issue about bra imprints and panty-lines may be more aesthetic than modesty but this girl with her black girlie bra just looked kinda skanky. Kinda reminds me of the "How much does it cost to look so cheap" article in Cosmo which showed some celebs in some cheap-looking outfit (think: bustier, mini shorts and fur coat combination, designer guni sack -- the kind of sack you use to pack 50kg of rice) which cost a bomb. Too bad I've recycled that issue. It's actually quite keep-worthy.
P.S: Hey hey, yufen, I got your lanterns today!!! I really like the big blue one leh. Hee hee I thought you were joking when you said you will send me lanterns!! Thank you!!!! Errr so does anyone know when zhong chiu (mid-autumn festival) is? I'm all ready to light my Jill-o-lantern's!
Wednesday, September 22, 2004
Burbur
There's an interesting blog (found by link-hopping) that I keep gravitating to. It belongs to a Singaporean chick (nicknamed burbur) with an attitude. For the past 4 days or so, I've been slowly built an image of her through the bits of her life she chose to share from 2001 till now. This particular entry struck a chord within me. I hope she really doesn't mind me reproducing it here... errr.... i guess i really should ask...
Title: the mindset of the new generation
i've only just realised how important money is to some people. don't mistake me, i know it's vital to surviving in this century, but the sheer mention of money, cash, is enough to make them want, crave. or it's the only thing they see when they look straight ahead, into their future. like while talking to a friend the other day, he was boasting about how his new job gave him all kinds of expenses, like it paid for his phone bill, his entertainment costs, the petrol that moved his car. my response was almost nonchalant, disinterested. i pictured a young man in a skewed shirt and tie ensemble, rushing from place to place, meeting people, shaking hands, exchanging smiles. making talk, nodding pleasantly, a fixed grin on his face. i mentioned offhand that it doesn't sound like what i'd do, and what else could he be doing but that, being nice to people, why else would the company invest money in that.
and he went into this tirade about how one had to work for the future, how his parents are old but they are still working, paying off mortgages. did i want to be like that when i grew older? don't i want to retire early and spend all the money i've hidden in my tin can under the bed? didn't i want $15,000 a month? what about climbing the ladder? don't i wanna achieve something like that? meeting people and extending the circle of business contacts is vital.
then i nicely explained to him, of course, which idiot didn't want that much money every 30 days, but only on my own terms. and that meant doing what i wanted. and that didn't include shaking people's hands, or getting to know them better. coz i frankly do not like people enough to display such extreme social skills that i sorely lack. you do not give time to those you cannot be concerned with.
he got defensive. he said he shook those hands, smiled that smile coz he was really sincere about knowing people. the talk wasn't just small, he really meant it whenever he nodded in response. i shrugged again. i said that could be because you enjoy doing it, and you like it. but not everyone does, and that includes me.
but don't you want to expand your business circle? to go up the ladder?
at whose expense? why would i want to do all these things for such selfish reasons i.e. myself.
he tsked at me and said i had so much potential yet i'm wasting my time on a lowly paid job, like those who did administration. i accused him of being a "-cist" coz that was what he was. he was biased against those who did not achieve the way he did. and my job is not lowly paid. some people have really skewed notions about what my job really is. and it enrages me, not coz they think lowly of me, but because they refuse to change their mindsets. people are stupid like that. now you see why i refuse to shake the hand of a person when i don't have to?
he went on and on about how important money was. all i could say was: my friend, i would rather enjoy my life now, doing what i want, than wait till i get too old with arthritis to spend money on anything. he rebutted with a: we only have 20 years more before we're too old to work. why are you wasting your youth?
i wondered why was he wasting his present on his future?
do you know what was the next thing he asked?
"are you having PMS or what?"
i give up. how can anyone fight with that.
Title: the mindset of the new generation
i've only just realised how important money is to some people. don't mistake me, i know it's vital to surviving in this century, but the sheer mention of money, cash, is enough to make them want, crave. or it's the only thing they see when they look straight ahead, into their future. like while talking to a friend the other day, he was boasting about how his new job gave him all kinds of expenses, like it paid for his phone bill, his entertainment costs, the petrol that moved his car. my response was almost nonchalant, disinterested. i pictured a young man in a skewed shirt and tie ensemble, rushing from place to place, meeting people, shaking hands, exchanging smiles. making talk, nodding pleasantly, a fixed grin on his face. i mentioned offhand that it doesn't sound like what i'd do, and what else could he be doing but that, being nice to people, why else would the company invest money in that.
and he went into this tirade about how one had to work for the future, how his parents are old but they are still working, paying off mortgages. did i want to be like that when i grew older? don't i want to retire early and spend all the money i've hidden in my tin can under the bed? didn't i want $15,000 a month? what about climbing the ladder? don't i wanna achieve something like that? meeting people and extending the circle of business contacts is vital.
then i nicely explained to him, of course, which idiot didn't want that much money every 30 days, but only on my own terms. and that meant doing what i wanted. and that didn't include shaking people's hands, or getting to know them better. coz i frankly do not like people enough to display such extreme social skills that i sorely lack. you do not give time to those you cannot be concerned with.
he got defensive. he said he shook those hands, smiled that smile coz he was really sincere about knowing people. the talk wasn't just small, he really meant it whenever he nodded in response. i shrugged again. i said that could be because you enjoy doing it, and you like it. but not everyone does, and that includes me.
but don't you want to expand your business circle? to go up the ladder?
at whose expense? why would i want to do all these things for such selfish reasons i.e. myself.
he tsked at me and said i had so much potential yet i'm wasting my time on a lowly paid job, like those who did administration. i accused him of being a "-cist" coz that was what he was. he was biased against those who did not achieve the way he did. and my job is not lowly paid. some people have really skewed notions about what my job really is. and it enrages me, not coz they think lowly of me, but because they refuse to change their mindsets. people are stupid like that. now you see why i refuse to shake the hand of a person when i don't have to?
he went on and on about how important money was. all i could say was: my friend, i would rather enjoy my life now, doing what i want, than wait till i get too old with arthritis to spend money on anything. he rebutted with a: we only have 20 years more before we're too old to work. why are you wasting your youth?
i wondered why was he wasting his present on his future?
do you know what was the next thing he asked?
"are you having PMS or what?"
i give up. how can anyone fight with that.
Tuesday, September 21, 2004
Retards
Sometimes you wonder how some retarded people actually get themselves into top unis. And probably with a scholarship to boot. Maybe this is what those bengs and lians mean when they talk about being more street smart. These dudes here are dumber than a cow and more kiasu than..... well, they are singaporeans... more kiasu than Americans (yes, Americans will wake up at 5:30am to enroll in courses and enroll in all sorts of random shit even though they don't plan to take them "just in case".)
So they took some tests and was awarded advance placement credits ( basically course waivers) Do they have to keep emailing the teacher who awarded them the credits, the registrar, advisors and any one they can get their grubby hands on? Hmmm the teach said she gave the list to some arts and sciences secretary BUT (oh no, end of the world! Run, Forest, run!!!!!!!!) the engineering registrar says they didn't receive it!!!! How how? I'm the centre of the universe here. Why is it not done yet? Why why why why? I want my credits NOW!!!! GIMME GIMME!! Let me see, list given to secretary, how come registrar doesn't have them? Maybe because the secretary didn't and doesn't need to give to the bloody registrar? Maybe because she has something better to do than to pander to some whiney no-brain kids' needs? Just freaking sit back and let them do their work instead of slowing them down with your whiny emails. Retards.
Which also reminds me of some other guy who's stupidly self-centred (ha! and he's supposed to be a phd student. Gawd, grow up!) and keep pointing out the "condescending tone" people used when they told him he was seriously mistaken when he is. I pity his future students. And girlfriend/wife, if he ever gets one. Another one of those guys who won't admit it even when he's wrong and instead shouts back, louder, that you are using a condescending tone. Hardy har. Suck it, dude.
Sincerely,
Pissed off with the world.
So they took some tests and was awarded advance placement credits ( basically course waivers) Do they have to keep emailing the teacher who awarded them the credits, the registrar, advisors and any one they can get their grubby hands on? Hmmm the teach said she gave the list to some arts and sciences secretary BUT (oh no, end of the world! Run, Forest, run!!!!!!!!) the engineering registrar says they didn't receive it!!!! How how? I'm the centre of the universe here. Why is it not done yet? Why why why why? I want my credits NOW!!!! GIMME GIMME!! Let me see, list given to secretary, how come registrar doesn't have them? Maybe because the secretary didn't and doesn't need to give to the bloody registrar? Maybe because she has something better to do than to pander to some whiney no-brain kids' needs? Just freaking sit back and let them do their work instead of slowing them down with your whiny emails. Retards.
Which also reminds me of some other guy who's stupidly self-centred (ha! and he's supposed to be a phd student. Gawd, grow up!) and keep pointing out the "condescending tone" people used when they told him he was seriously mistaken when he is. I pity his future students. And girlfriend/wife, if he ever gets one. Another one of those guys who won't admit it even when he's wrong and instead shouts back, louder, that you are using a condescending tone. Hardy har. Suck it, dude.
Sincerely,
Pissed off with the world.
From Hero to Zero
You know a semester has really commenced when your classes are pared down to 2/3 or even 1/2 its usual attendance. My 8:40am class is looking more forlorn. For once in my university life, I actually do not want to miss any lectures. For once, the readings are done (whether they are on time or not remains to be seen) The (almost) model and straight-A student in JC who had never missed a JC class (except PE) had become a handmaiden of truancy. Who would have thought? Well, maybe a lot of people.
Somehow, my classmates of yore have the impression of me being quite the cheongster. At that time, I was very eager for clubbing. Alcohol was never a big draw for me. Neither is the music, I don't particularly like techno music and I'd probably die on Mambo nights from rolling my eyes to the coordinated, heart-touting hands. I just wanted to dance, with abandon, with myself. I rebuked worries with the swing of my hips, shed the shell of prudeness with my waving limbs. I was enjoying the contortions of my body, oblivious to most around me, eyes closed in a world of my own. At the end of it, only "I" emerged from that crucible. "I", with a head of smoke-braided hair.
Those wilder days are somewhat behind me. As I think about it, I dread the random guys who dance too close, the swirling nauseating alcohol in my body (yeah after being semi-drunkish once, I've stopped drinking. Plus, I have a lousy dis-ability to hold alcohol) and the whole smoking chamber. The biggest reason is probably because I dun have any kakis (as in good partners-in-crime) to go pub-hopping with. The second biggest reason is my darling hates pubs. And dancing. And smoke. So that's how I ended up being in the land of Friday-Saturday night parties and never actually gone to a pub/club. (plus, they always want to check your ID and the only legit one I have is my passport...so yeah.... not a good idea)
Somehow, my classmates of yore have the impression of me being quite the cheongster. At that time, I was very eager for clubbing. Alcohol was never a big draw for me. Neither is the music, I don't particularly like techno music and I'd probably die on Mambo nights from rolling my eyes to the coordinated, heart-touting hands. I just wanted to dance, with abandon, with myself. I rebuked worries with the swing of my hips, shed the shell of prudeness with my waving limbs. I was enjoying the contortions of my body, oblivious to most around me, eyes closed in a world of my own. At the end of it, only "I" emerged from that crucible. "I", with a head of smoke-braided hair.
Those wilder days are somewhat behind me. As I think about it, I dread the random guys who dance too close, the swirling nauseating alcohol in my body (yeah after being semi-drunkish once, I've stopped drinking. Plus, I have a lousy dis-ability to hold alcohol) and the whole smoking chamber. The biggest reason is probably because I dun have any kakis (as in good partners-in-crime) to go pub-hopping with. The second biggest reason is my darling hates pubs. And dancing. And smoke. So that's how I ended up being in the land of Friday-Saturday night parties and never actually gone to a pub/club. (plus, they always want to check your ID and the only legit one I have is my passport...so yeah.... not a good idea)
Monday, September 20, 2004
Rabid *click* *click* *click*
Is it my imagination or do people stop blogging once school starts? Due to my recent blogging obsession, I've started checking out every blog on my list reliogiously every couple of hours. I think I need therapy. Retail therapy sounds kinda nice. After realizing that my blog is splattered with pics of stinky old shoes and a bag, I think I need more of that (that as in retail therapy not stinky shoes, though I won't mind getting more bags and shoes for that matter) Anyway, lots of people seemed to have disappeared from their blogs since summer started. Maybe it's because they actually have a life *sniff* Not like a certain someone who's just rabidly clicking on her links, reading news after news online and checking blog after blog looking for stuff to read.
Current book: Information Rules by Shapiro and some other dude (it's actually a textbook for one of my classes much to the horror of my fellow course-mates)
Current book: Information Rules by Shapiro and some other dude (it's actually a textbook for one of my classes much to the horror of my fellow course-mates)
Sunday, September 19, 2004
Stew in process
The smell of my latest culinary experiment wafts into the bedroom. After that botched attempt at making pancakes, I was wary. Would it end up as another feed to the bin masterpiece? I guess nothing can go really wrong when it comes to stew.
After putting off cooking it, I've finally decided that my beef cubes would probably go bad if I leave them uneaten any longer. (How long can I keep meat in a freezer? I actually still have 2 servings of salmon. The other 4 servings went into plain ole fried salmon and nova egg. Yummy!) It is freezing today as well. The remnants of Hurricane Ivan . The stew would be well appreciated even if it was slightly disasteriffic. I was actually hoping that fluttering (more like thundering) around the kitchen would warm my frozen pinkies.
Went through some recipe sites including the kuali@thestar to get a clue on how to start. Ingredients needed: 500g fillet of beef, beef cube, 2 cm cinnamon stick (who the hell sells 2 cm of cinnamon stick!?!), 1 star anise (hmmmm don't think they have these in US), 4 cloves (I presume it's garlic? Aren't there any other things you call cloves? Like clover?), 2 large onions and potatoes. Hmm they didn't mention what I was supposed to cook all that in. Some sites actually said fry the beef and garlic etc in the pot but I've always associated frying with my handy non-stick. Non-stick was dirty though. Guess the pot will have to do. Okay, down went two tablespoon of cooking oil. Heating, heating, heating.... *sizzle* I guess that's my cue that the oil is hot. So I dropped a couple of cloves of garlic in. *sputter sputter* *sizzle sizzle sizzle* maybe I should have dried that garlic? This this is like spewing oil all over me, the floor and anything it can reach. Where's the lid, where's the lid? Ah-ha! Found it behind the rice-cooker next to the fridge. Phew.... saved.
I tried to shake the contents of the pot a little. Supposed to fry until fragrant. Well, I surely smell something but meanwhile I just took out the frozen beef from the freezer. The damn thing refused to come off it's styrofoam container. Dammit, the garlic will have to wait. After rinsing the meat under the tap, those pieces of black styrofoam came off. Now I just have to put this into the pot and "fry to seal in the juices". So up came the lid and some pretty charcoal-fied garlic greeted me. Kinda looked like those dudes with a bad sun-tan, only smellier. Oh well, in you go beefy thing. Another round of protest from the hot oil.
Finally it was time to season the thing. I whipped out my handy-dandy, all-purpose marinade cum seasoning sauce -- Bovril!!! That and a pinch of salt, some soy sauce, some worchestershire sauce, pepper and a sprinkling of garlic poweder for good measure, nevermind that I already have REAL garlic in the pot. The rest of the slicing and dicing on onions, potatoes and carrots were pretty uneventful. Except for the old milking and soggy onion which made my darling have to walk out for a fresh one at Jason's deli and the fact that my darling kept feeding the potatoes to the sink and floor as he was cutting it up. So yeah, the whole pot has ben simmering for a couple of hours now. It was kinda sad though that it actually smells kinda like the ABC soup that I use to cook pretty often except with a lace of W.sauce and a lot of bovril goodness!
After putting off cooking it, I've finally decided that my beef cubes would probably go bad if I leave them uneaten any longer. (How long can I keep meat in a freezer? I actually still have 2 servings of salmon. The other 4 servings went into plain ole fried salmon and nova egg. Yummy!) It is freezing today as well. The remnants of Hurricane Ivan . The stew would be well appreciated even if it was slightly disasteriffic. I was actually hoping that fluttering (more like thundering) around the kitchen would warm my frozen pinkies.
Went through some recipe sites including the kuali@thestar to get a clue on how to start. Ingredients needed: 500g fillet of beef, beef cube, 2 cm cinnamon stick (who the hell sells 2 cm of cinnamon stick!?!), 1 star anise (hmmmm don't think they have these in US), 4 cloves (I presume it's garlic? Aren't there any other things you call cloves? Like clover?), 2 large onions and potatoes. Hmm they didn't mention what I was supposed to cook all that in. Some sites actually said fry the beef and garlic etc in the pot but I've always associated frying with my handy non-stick. Non-stick was dirty though. Guess the pot will have to do. Okay, down went two tablespoon of cooking oil. Heating, heating, heating.... *sizzle* I guess that's my cue that the oil is hot. So I dropped a couple of cloves of garlic in. *sputter sputter* *sizzle sizzle sizzle* maybe I should have dried that garlic? This this is like spewing oil all over me, the floor and anything it can reach. Where's the lid, where's the lid? Ah-ha! Found it behind the rice-cooker next to the fridge. Phew.... saved.
I tried to shake the contents of the pot a little. Supposed to fry until fragrant. Well, I surely smell something but meanwhile I just took out the frozen beef from the freezer. The damn thing refused to come off it's styrofoam container. Dammit, the garlic will have to wait. After rinsing the meat under the tap, those pieces of black styrofoam came off. Now I just have to put this into the pot and "fry to seal in the juices". So up came the lid and some pretty charcoal-fied garlic greeted me. Kinda looked like those dudes with a bad sun-tan, only smellier. Oh well, in you go beefy thing. Another round of protest from the hot oil.
Finally it was time to season the thing. I whipped out my handy-dandy, all-purpose marinade cum seasoning sauce -- Bovril!!! That and a pinch of salt, some soy sauce, some worchestershire sauce, pepper and a sprinkling of garlic poweder for good measure, nevermind that I already have REAL garlic in the pot. The rest of the slicing and dicing on onions, potatoes and carrots were pretty uneventful. Except for the old milking and soggy onion which made my darling have to walk out for a fresh one at Jason's deli and the fact that my darling kept feeding the potatoes to the sink and floor as he was cutting it up. So yeah, the whole pot has ben simmering for a couple of hours now. It was kinda sad though that it actually smells kinda like the ABC soup that I use to cook pretty often except with a lace of W.sauce and a lot of bovril goodness!
Saturday, September 18, 2004
A bag, a bag!!!
Whee bought an orange, croc print bag for $18 from Kaufmann's. Darling says that I'm always so happy when I actually buy stuff I sound kinda sad and deprived. :P He says he wants to buy me more stuff just so he can see me so exhilarated more often. Hee hee. Nearly bought a pair of Anna Klein sandals from DSW. It was a size 8 1/2 but it didn't quite fit. There was this 1/2 inch expanse of space between my toes and the edge of the sandals. Too bad they didn't have it in size 8!!! It was a really pretty green and orange pair of sandals. I just realized that the big toe on my left foot is significantly stumpier than my second toe. Alien attack!
Me new bag!
Me new bag!
Friday, September 17, 2004
My nautidog!!!
I was so close, so close! This is my favorite T-shirt we're talking about here. It features a cute dog also known as the psycho chihuahua. Darling has like one of those shirts. It's all holey and grey now. It used to be white. I love that shirt.
I tried to search online for it and actually found a website that sells it!!! Then as I try to complete the transaction, I was given some error. I just hope it's because this company is in Florida. How long will they take to get their business up again?!? Oh no, maybe my shirts were taken by hurricane Ivan. Now we know what it was after!!! Nooooooooo..........
Pic of the T-shirt below for the curious.
I tried to search online for it and actually found a website that sells it!!! Then as I try to complete the transaction, I was given some error. I just hope it's because this company is in Florida. How long will they take to get their business up again?!? Oh no, maybe my shirts were taken by hurricane Ivan. Now we know what it was after!!! Nooooooooo..........
Pic of the T-shirt below for the curious.
Thursday, September 16, 2004
Technophilic Assault
Okay okay, after some furthur investigations, I found out that Skype is not totally perfect, though it's still not bad nontheless. (could you guys email me your phone numbers btw? and yufen, could I get your icq/msn/aol nick as well?) To make a call, your computer needs to be decently high-performance. Something like a PIII 1Gb processor will mean that you cannot do anything else while you make a call otherwise it will hang your computer. A cable or dsl connection is also preferable. So I guess making free calls home is out of the question here. Well, not like it was ever in question since my mum and dad are techno-ignorant. Making them download and install the software, then register a nick etc would prob be beyond them. Plus my home pc kinda sucks ... so yeah. I guess this is just my sudden desire to enbrace technology kicking in. I kinda wanted a PDA a while back also though I'm now kinda not so hot about it anymore. Kinda expensive for a souped up organizer. And I really don't use my pen and paper organizers very often. Not from lack of trying either.
I guess despite what I've said before about being abroad is the same as say in Singapore, I guess I was wrong. In the NUS environment, I don't think I would have grew to enjoy my classes so much. I wouldn't actually like projects. I wouldn't be so techno-philic. I wouldn't have the desire to want to know more. I wouldn't be an OR major. I would not love cooking. I would not have enjoyed life in university as much. While dorms are a good place for socializing etc, I really really love our apartment here in Ithaca. It's my own little world here and I actually have my own fridge and kitchen. Without full reign over a kitchen, I would never have enjoyed cooking. If I had waited until I start work before I get a place on my own, I'd probably be too busy to cook etc. Or maybe not. At any rate, I'm feeling happy. Somehow everything is falling into place. I'm enjoying my courses this semester, more so than any other ones so far. So yeah I'm HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY! Whee!!! And it's the weekend again! Whee!
I guess despite what I've said before about being abroad is the same as say in Singapore, I guess I was wrong. In the NUS environment, I don't think I would have grew to enjoy my classes so much. I wouldn't actually like projects. I wouldn't be so techno-philic. I wouldn't have the desire to want to know more. I wouldn't be an OR major. I would not love cooking. I would not have enjoyed life in university as much. While dorms are a good place for socializing etc, I really really love our apartment here in Ithaca. It's my own little world here and I actually have my own fridge and kitchen. Without full reign over a kitchen, I would never have enjoyed cooking. If I had waited until I start work before I get a place on my own, I'd probably be too busy to cook etc. Or maybe not. At any rate, I'm feeling happy. Somehow everything is falling into place. I'm enjoying my courses this semester, more so than any other ones so far. So yeah I'm HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY! Whee!!! And it's the weekend again! Whee!
Wednesday, September 15, 2004
Skype
Okay, okay this is somewhat exciting. I've read about this company called Skype. It provides a VoIP service which is Voice over Internet Protocol. Basically, their software allows you to call other people over the internet. The sound quality is supposed to be pretty good and most importantly, the rates are cheap or not existent. Calling someone else who's using Skype is free while calling landlines aka home phones and mobile phones cost something like S$0.05/ min to call the Singapore.
The only thing you need besides the software is a speaker and microphone or a PC headset. I kinda want to try this out with one/some of you guys sort of as a test drive before I decide it's good and buy their credits to call home and also because it's been so long since we've actually heard each other's voice!. Hmmm I don't think I have a mike on my pc though, so I might have to buy a headset after all. Meanwhile you guys should go download Skype and "call" each other!!! My nick there is yanmonster. Ciao dudettes. Have fun!!!
The only thing you need besides the software is a speaker and microphone or a PC headset. I kinda want to try this out with one/some of you guys sort of as a test drive before I decide it's good and buy their credits to call home and also because it's been so long since we've actually heard each other's voice!. Hmmm I don't think I have a mike on my pc though, so I might have to buy a headset after all. Meanwhile you guys should go download Skype and "call" each other!!! My nick there is yanmonster. Ciao dudettes. Have fun!!!
Monday, September 13, 2004
Blogging and Hotmail
After I placed my blog as my default page on Mozilla (yes, finally no more ie and it's accompanying exploitation) and my switch to blogger, the frequency of blogging has gone up significantly. For one thing, blogger makes it a lot easier for me to add stuff like pics and links which made me put up a list of links to those sites I visit frequently which then leads to me coming back to my blog more often which then makes me feel like blogging. Okay, after that long winded sentence and the distraction of reading other blogs, I've totally lost what I was going to say...
Oh yeah, I was thinking of how comforting it is that this blog is only frequented by people who are close to me. (actually I don't know that...there might be other people who sort of know me who reads this but let's just pretend there isn't... errr...or whoever it is, drop me a msg so I know you're here?) At least only people who are close to me officially knows this site. People who don't and happen to read nasty stuff about them here... too bad, you asked for it :) As I was saying, I feel very comfortable saying what's really on my mind. Like my fear of trying on shoes. Haven't really thought about that in while actually. When I was younger (like 11/12?) I really disliked buying clothes and I hated buying shoes with a passion.
Hey, suddenly this image of this red pair of shoes I used to own flashed into my mind. They are really flashy and shiny in the plastic-y kind of way but I used to really love them. They felt like they came out of a story book or wizard of oz. More random thoughts about little things I own are now flooding my memory banks at the moment. Like a red sports watch I had. Ok, cut, zip... need to focus. Yeah just ignore this last paragraph.
The thing is I can blab on and on because I know that no one is judging me. At least I hope no one is judging me :) When it comes to old friends, and I mean friends who have known you for at least 9 years, you can do all sorts of silly things and they still love you. It's like me not liking smokers. In fact, I detest them. When I see one on the street, I'll wish he/she would just die faster of lung cancer and not drag the rest of the world with him/her. But if say Eilene or Yufen suddenly takes up smoking (which I seriously, seriously hope they never do), I would still love them as them. It doesn't take away from any of the chummy and happy feeling I have in my relationship with them. It doesn't mean I won't advice them to stop or that I would approve but I won't judge. I can imagine that the same applies to me if i do something they don't like and it just feels, for wont of a better word, nice.
Onto a totally irrelevant and tangential topic, I find that while I'm starting to really respect the smarts in Microsoft, I still can't shake off the irritation of being of the wrong end of their devious (but legal (?)) tactics. Remember that time when Gmail first made it in the news and announced that their users would get 1Gb of mail space? Yahoo and Hotmail both said that they would also increase their mail capacity to 100 Mb and 200 Mb respectively. Yahoo's change was immediate (cheers for yahoo users!). However, Hotmail is STILL keeping me on my measly 10Mb. So yeah, I'm officially switching to Gmail. I've already successfully exported my address book anyway. ( It wasn't a particularly easy task either...*grumble*) Now the only things I have to do is change my email on the lists that I subscribe to. Oh yeah this is one of their sneaky tactics too. Free web mail providers don't forward email that has been sent to your old account to your new account if you disable the old one. This is so that the switching costs is high so you'll be more likely to continue using their products even though they are not the best in the market. So yeah take that, Hotmail aka Microsoft, I'm switching anyway!
P.S: Haha actually recently I find myself more willing to experiment with the technology that I use. I'm actually contemplating using Linux in the near future though I'm still slightly apprehensive.
Edit: P.P.S: Oh forgot to mention though, that I'll never ever buy an Apple product in the next 10 years at least. Absolutely absolutely no chance of me switching over to a Mac. Never really liked them all that much though I thought they were kinda cool. Well, not anymore, their iPod pissed me off when I couldn't transfer MP3s from the damn thing back to the PC. Luckily those were backed those up. But yeah, Apple = bad!
Oh yeah, I was thinking of how comforting it is that this blog is only frequented by people who are close to me. (actually I don't know that...there might be other people who sort of know me who reads this but let's just pretend there isn't... errr...or whoever it is, drop me a msg so I know you're here?) At least only people who are close to me officially knows this site. People who don't and happen to read nasty stuff about them here... too bad, you asked for it :) As I was saying, I feel very comfortable saying what's really on my mind. Like my fear of trying on shoes. Haven't really thought about that in while actually. When I was younger (like 11/12?) I really disliked buying clothes and I hated buying shoes with a passion.
Hey, suddenly this image of this red pair of shoes I used to own flashed into my mind. They are really flashy and shiny in the plastic-y kind of way but I used to really love them. They felt like they came out of a story book or wizard of oz. More random thoughts about little things I own are now flooding my memory banks at the moment. Like a red sports watch I had. Ok, cut, zip... need to focus. Yeah just ignore this last paragraph.
The thing is I can blab on and on because I know that no one is judging me. At least I hope no one is judging me :) When it comes to old friends, and I mean friends who have known you for at least 9 years, you can do all sorts of silly things and they still love you. It's like me not liking smokers. In fact, I detest them. When I see one on the street, I'll wish he/she would just die faster of lung cancer and not drag the rest of the world with him/her. But if say Eilene or Yufen suddenly takes up smoking (which I seriously, seriously hope they never do), I would still love them as them. It doesn't take away from any of the chummy and happy feeling I have in my relationship with them. It doesn't mean I won't advice them to stop or that I would approve but I won't judge. I can imagine that the same applies to me if i do something they don't like and it just feels, for wont of a better word, nice.
Onto a totally irrelevant and tangential topic, I find that while I'm starting to really respect the smarts in Microsoft, I still can't shake off the irritation of being of the wrong end of their devious (but legal (?)) tactics. Remember that time when Gmail first made it in the news and announced that their users would get 1Gb of mail space? Yahoo and Hotmail both said that they would also increase their mail capacity to 100 Mb and 200 Mb respectively. Yahoo's change was immediate (cheers for yahoo users!). However, Hotmail is STILL keeping me on my measly 10Mb. So yeah, I'm officially switching to Gmail. I've already successfully exported my address book anyway. ( It wasn't a particularly easy task either...*grumble*) Now the only things I have to do is change my email on the lists that I subscribe to. Oh yeah this is one of their sneaky tactics too. Free web mail providers don't forward email that has been sent to your old account to your new account if you disable the old one. This is so that the switching costs is high so you'll be more likely to continue using their products even though they are not the best in the market. So yeah take that, Hotmail aka Microsoft, I'm switching anyway!
P.S: Haha actually recently I find myself more willing to experiment with the technology that I use. I'm actually contemplating using Linux in the near future though I'm still slightly apprehensive.
Edit: P.P.S: Oh forgot to mention though, that I'll never ever buy an Apple product in the next 10 years at least. Absolutely absolutely no chance of me switching over to a Mac. Never really liked them all that much though I thought they were kinda cool. Well, not anymore, their iPod pissed me off when I couldn't transfer MP3s from the damn thing back to the PC. Luckily those were backed those up. But yeah, Apple = bad!
Sunday, September 12, 2004
Shoes and stuff
Me new balance sneakers!
N for Nike?
My slimey old sandals looking so worn. :(
Bald spots and wrinkles.
Bald spots and wrinkles.
Sole Disturbance
My sandals are "balding" in places. It's no longer smooth and cushiony for me feet. Rather, it chafes them, giving them ugly blisters. When it rains, it's reduced to a lump of sliminess. Not a pretty sight I assure you. They have obviously lived past their natural lifespan.
For once, sandals actually lasted for more than six months for me. I remember back in hostel days, some part of it would fall out after the predestined lifetime of half a year. I was quite convinced there was something funny with the way I walk that makes them do that. Now that I think about it, it's probably the result of buying those RM30 a pair sandals. My current pair actually cost $100++, I think. At least I'd like to believe so. The logic behind that was so that they could last me at least a year while I'm in the states. They were a pretty brown and actually made my feet look feminine and slim. My feet has always been a source of misery. I mentally cringe when I have to walk into a shoe department and buy a new pair of footwear. The countless memories of rejection -- "sorry we don't have one in your size" and the embarassment when their sizes aree smaller than usual so that when I try those delicate shoes on, I feel like an elephant in heels.
Nothing has really changed about that, much to my chagrin. Since my old pair of sneakers are also in a near death state and since sandals cost around the same as a pair of new sneakers and since the cold non-feet-baring months are soon upon us and since I already have another pair of sandals at home, I decided to buy a pair of sneakers. (despite all that rationalizing, still can't change the fact that somehow, me sandals dying on me made me buy sneakers) Yeah so I got a pair of New Balance for US$30. Not a bad deal if you ask me. For another 10 bucks I could have gotten a nike. But it's nike... plus the brands really hardly matter to me. My last pair was a new balance as well and kinda comfy. Haha when darling first saw the brand years ago, he thought it was some Nike rip-off since the logo was a big fat N -- for possibly Nike.
As far as I was concerned, my awkwardness in a shoe shop has not lessenned. I would have thought that like clothing, I should be significantly dwarfed in some way in the feet department. But when I tried on the pair that I eventually chose, I found that it was a wide and it fitted me perfectly. I guess I should rejoice that it fits well. But WIDE?!? Kinda demoralizing to think of my feet as wide though actually I have always known them to be so. I guess it's just the stigma of being wide when it comes to size. So the salesperson rather untactlyfully asked me if I'm sure I want a wide. Yeah yeah so my feet is proportionally bigger than my body size.... didn't have to rub it in. I guess if she has been a little more friendly to begin with I wouldn't have felt so bad. Nah, probably wouldn't have made a difference.
I guess that's one reason why I have never been a big shoes fan. Don't forsee myself having hundreds of pairs of shoes like a lot of women do. One for each occasion, each dress, each outfit, they say. I think I'll stick to my good old, serviceable, multipurpose shoes.
For once, sandals actually lasted for more than six months for me. I remember back in hostel days, some part of it would fall out after the predestined lifetime of half a year. I was quite convinced there was something funny with the way I walk that makes them do that. Now that I think about it, it's probably the result of buying those RM30 a pair sandals. My current pair actually cost $100++, I think. At least I'd like to believe so. The logic behind that was so that they could last me at least a year while I'm in the states. They were a pretty brown and actually made my feet look feminine and slim. My feet has always been a source of misery. I mentally cringe when I have to walk into a shoe department and buy a new pair of footwear. The countless memories of rejection -- "sorry we don't have one in your size" and the embarassment when their sizes aree smaller than usual so that when I try those delicate shoes on, I feel like an elephant in heels.
Nothing has really changed about that, much to my chagrin. Since my old pair of sneakers are also in a near death state and since sandals cost around the same as a pair of new sneakers and since the cold non-feet-baring months are soon upon us and since I already have another pair of sandals at home, I decided to buy a pair of sneakers. (despite all that rationalizing, still can't change the fact that somehow, me sandals dying on me made me buy sneakers) Yeah so I got a pair of New Balance for US$30. Not a bad deal if you ask me. For another 10 bucks I could have gotten a nike. But it's nike... plus the brands really hardly matter to me. My last pair was a new balance as well and kinda comfy. Haha when darling first saw the brand years ago, he thought it was some Nike rip-off since the logo was a big fat N -- for possibly Nike.
As far as I was concerned, my awkwardness in a shoe shop has not lessenned. I would have thought that like clothing, I should be significantly dwarfed in some way in the feet department. But when I tried on the pair that I eventually chose, I found that it was a wide and it fitted me perfectly. I guess I should rejoice that it fits well. But WIDE?!? Kinda demoralizing to think of my feet as wide though actually I have always known them to be so. I guess it's just the stigma of being wide when it comes to size. So the salesperson rather untactlyfully asked me if I'm sure I want a wide. Yeah yeah so my feet is proportionally bigger than my body size.... didn't have to rub it in. I guess if she has been a little more friendly to begin with I wouldn't have felt so bad. Nah, probably wouldn't have made a difference.
I guess that's one reason why I have never been a big shoes fan. Don't forsee myself having hundreds of pairs of shoes like a lot of women do. One for each occasion, each dress, each outfit, they say. I think I'll stick to my good old, serviceable, multipurpose shoes.
Wednesday, September 08, 2004
Airlines
Many key players in the airline industry are on the brink on bankruptcy... again. US Airways need to secure $800 million in salary and benefits cuts by the end of the month to avoid liquidation. It looks like the US national carrier will face bankruptcy for the second time in two years as discussions with the pilots' union have not been smooth. If, the airline manages to overcome this threat of bankruptcy (and that's a pretty big if), the airline chairman says that his plans is to restructure US Airways as a low cost carrier (think Jetblue and SouthWest)
Being in Singapore for so many years has ingrained into me the notion that a national carrier should be a source of pride. Malaysia's national carrier MAS appears decently prestigious despite poor revenues. A national carrier is like a national flower or anthem -- something symbolic of the country, a physical representation of their ideals. It saddens me to hear of the difficulties the American carrier is having. It's not the only one within the US airline industry with troubles either. Delta Airlines, the nation's third largest carriers is cutting 10% or 7000 of its jobs over the next 18 months and will no longer be serving one of its hubs - Dallas - to avoid bankruptcy; Italian flagship carrier Alatalia is near bankruptcy. The union negotiations are hauntingly reminiscent of the ones in Singapore between SIA and their pilots. Cathay Pacific also has a history of pilots on strike. It would appear that pilots are pretty high maintenance but it's probably because I'm not looking at it from their point of view.
In general, the industry seems to be hard hit by escalating oil prices and declining fares due to the presence of budget carriers. Price wars among the budget carriers in Singapore also makes me wonder if these companies are actually making money. The recent $1 airfare to Thailand by Tiger Airways has prompted AirAsia to start a $0.49 promotion fare to the same destination. Hmmm actually now that you think about it, the tickets are one-way only, which means that the return ticket would be full fare (?) If so, it actually translates to about 50% discount which is nice but not something to make me bubbling with excitement.
Being in Singapore for so many years has ingrained into me the notion that a national carrier should be a source of pride. Malaysia's national carrier MAS appears decently prestigious despite poor revenues. A national carrier is like a national flower or anthem -- something symbolic of the country, a physical representation of their ideals. It saddens me to hear of the difficulties the American carrier is having. It's not the only one within the US airline industry with troubles either. Delta Airlines, the nation's third largest carriers is cutting 10% or 7000 of its jobs over the next 18 months and will no longer be serving one of its hubs - Dallas - to avoid bankruptcy; Italian flagship carrier Alatalia is near bankruptcy. The union negotiations are hauntingly reminiscent of the ones in Singapore between SIA and their pilots. Cathay Pacific also has a history of pilots on strike. It would appear that pilots are pretty high maintenance but it's probably because I'm not looking at it from their point of view.
In general, the industry seems to be hard hit by escalating oil prices and declining fares due to the presence of budget carriers. Price wars among the budget carriers in Singapore also makes me wonder if these companies are actually making money. The recent $1 airfare to Thailand by Tiger Airways has prompted AirAsia to start a $0.49 promotion fare to the same destination. Hmmm actually now that you think about it, the tickets are one-way only, which means that the return ticket would be full fare (?) If so, it actually translates to about 50% discount which is nice but not something to make me bubbling with excitement.
Tuesday, September 07, 2004
Phantom Limbs
Yufen was talking about meeting her old sec 4 classmates. It took me about 5 seconds to realize that hey! those were my classmates too! After I leave school, I have an unsavoury habit of amputating my past, content to just let the sweet and bitter mess lie in a rotting heap.
I wanted to go somewhere else, somewhere where I may start afresh. I was a different person. A lot more vulnerable. A lot more.... common. And a lot more escapist. Misunderstood. Less antisocial. Resigned. But now that I've found the strength to accept all that, I don't have the urge to salvage anything. Let the dead rest in peace.
I wanted to go somewhere else, somewhere where I may start afresh. I was a different person. A lot more vulnerable. A lot more.... common. And a lot more escapist. Misunderstood. Less antisocial. Resigned. But now that I've found the strength to accept all that, I don't have the urge to salvage anything. Let the dead rest in peace.
Sunday, September 05, 2004
My Creaking Joints
Heh heh after two days of "intensive" frisbee playing, I'm aching all over -- the joint of my fingers, my thighs, shoulders.... yeah pretty much the whole package except those muscles above the neck. Maybe if I try throwing the disc with my mouth or try to catch it with my teeth that will change. Somehow spending time playing (and exercising) makes my weekends feel more productive than usual. It's something out of the ordinary -- ordinary being me lying on the couch playing exercising my thumb on the PS2 controller. Might have something to do with my new found health consciousness. Btw did you know that they put flour in stew? Just sounds kinda weird that stew is pretty much dissolved flour with meat. I think the idea of the Oriental style clear soup still appeals more to me.
Decided to put up links to some stories I've read recently that are somewhat interesting. (Hot damn! I love blogger! It's so easy to link compared to dairyland. Heh whoops spoken like a true techno-idiot. Maybe after my IT course this semester I'll actually be a little more webpage-savvy. Lol)
Straits Times
Confession Anonymous
About a webpage for Singaporeans for people to confess their deepest secrets anonymously and let off steam. I personall just went to the webpage and marvel about how retarded most of those confessions are. Seriously, if you really like a girl, you either tell her or don't. What's the point in moping about it?
Taiwanese Stip-tease
I'm surprised to learn that at Hungry Ghost festivals in Taiwan, they actually hire strippers (fine fine, their term for it is dancers)
NY Times
Cost of Stress? US$300 Billion
The effects of stress on health apparently costs US $300 billion. I wonder if it's a similar scenario in Singapore? Conversely, some stress is also good for productivity. Is there a way to measure the threshold level of stress?
Screwed up School Ratings
The new federal system of rating schools have put many of the top schools in Florida under the category of failure. Reasons for that rating? Not enough students show up for a test or mentally retarded students do not perform at grade level.
Walmart and Productivity
Walmart has been hailed as one of the most productive and successful companies in the US. It was kinda interesting to learn that Walmart actually has more sales than Sears, Target, JCPenny, KMart and host of others combined. I never knew that Walmart is actually such a big enterprise. The article talks about how their success is actually based upon their low wage structure due to the large proportion of part-timers that they hire.
Decided to put up links to some stories I've read recently that are somewhat interesting. (Hot damn! I love blogger! It's so easy to link compared to dairyland. Heh whoops spoken like a true techno-idiot. Maybe after my IT course this semester I'll actually be a little more webpage-savvy. Lol)
Straits Times
Confession Anonymous
About a webpage for Singaporeans for people to confess their deepest secrets anonymously and let off steam. I personall just went to the webpage and marvel about how retarded most of those confessions are. Seriously, if you really like a girl, you either tell her or don't. What's the point in moping about it?
Taiwanese Stip-tease
I'm surprised to learn that at Hungry Ghost festivals in Taiwan, they actually hire strippers (fine fine, their term for it is dancers)
NY Times
Cost of Stress? US$300 Billion
The effects of stress on health apparently costs US $300 billion. I wonder if it's a similar scenario in Singapore? Conversely, some stress is also good for productivity. Is there a way to measure the threshold level of stress?
Screwed up School Ratings
The new federal system of rating schools have put many of the top schools in Florida under the category of failure. Reasons for that rating? Not enough students show up for a test or mentally retarded students do not perform at grade level.
Walmart and Productivity
Walmart has been hailed as one of the most productive and successful companies in the US. It was kinda interesting to learn that Walmart actually has more sales than Sears, Target, JCPenny, KMart and host of others combined. I never knew that Walmart is actually such a big enterprise. The article talks about how their success is actually based upon their low wage structure due to the large proportion of part-timers that they hire.
Friday, September 03, 2004
In My Own Skin
I’ve never once been comfortable in my own skin these 23 years. From the nascent years when I started to notice how I look, there was always something that distressed me. It was either my round (translate: big/ fat) face, unruly and big hair, my perceived overweight-ness (whether it is true remains a mystery), horrible pimple outbreaks, flabby arms, spares around the waist, imagined thunder thighs, simply fat ass or some random chest dissatisfaction. This was still true as of this summer. But somehow, somewhere, something just pounced onto these negative thoughts and imprisoned them. While my eyes still see those very same “imperfections”, the mind has started to accept the minute details as normal and the whole package as even somewhat attractive. Maybe it was the culmination of what Johnny has been telling me. Some of that has finally sunk in and I’ve begun to think of myself as beautiful. At least to my eyes. Not the I’m-a-blond-with-blue-eyes-doll type of beautiful. Not the doe-eyed-rebonded-hair-china-doll beautiful. Just a general wholesomeness.
<>Last day of the First week of my last year
I think I will miss life here dearly. The days of having to concentrate on only one thing -- studies will soon be over. But as with other momentous and unremarkable occasions like say the last day of the century, it feels just like any other. It is only when you have truly lost it that you value how much something is to you. And right now, I haven't lost it. But I know I will surely wish I had did something more with my time here, mainly because in retrospection, there was always time, motivation, opportunity for better things. But truly and honestly, if I had another go at it, I would not have changed anything. Perhaps except to cook a little more often :)
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